Home and Away

On Thursday evening, I sent my son to stay with his father's family in South Africa. The decision wasn't taken lightly and it in fact took a year to reach this point. I love my son dearly and I made it clear that he was'nt being sent away, but rather being shared.

Now the sceptics amongst you might say that's euphemistic speech, but I feel that I must clarify. Sharing my fifteen year old son is not like handing over a six month old baby to be baby sat. I had to share the responsibility of raising a boy that has been having a rather rough time of growing up recently. For the last ten years I have essentially done it all on my own. Too many irons on my fire (or should I say teenage children) hampered by a predominnatly female household and a lack of male role models has led to me having to admit that I needed some backup.

His father and I have our differences, but then we share a lot in common too and I have no doubt that I shall watch his dad make the same mistakes as myself but also come up with solutions that I had not thought of. After all isn't that what team work is all about.

I worry about all sorts of things and today had to deal with his school in Glasgow explaining that he would not be returning. There are a lot of unplanned side effects involved in this decision, but in the long run, I believe it is the right one.

We chat or message online almost daily and he so far appears to be relatively happy, the weather being most appealing. I already miss him terribly and his younger sister misses him too. I wonder if this life experience will teach him to appreciate the relationships that most of us take for granted. I love my boy and hope that he settles in well and gets on with his family in South Africa.

Ruthie Richards-Hill

Ruth, a free range human being and a middle aged mum of three adult children and very young grandmother to two little girls, is a glass artist, and a digital strategist, She retains the right to change her mind about anything and believes in a compassionate approach to most things, you can contact her using the contact page on this blog.

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